I'm just a Jerk, don't you know?

Nostalgia…it’s something you read about in books, but never something I thought I’d experience. I mean sure, I figured that when I was old and living in a musty house with my cat, I’d recall the good ole’ days and consider how it was, wishing those days could return. So why do I feel like that now? I’m seeing everything in a light that reminds me of what I’ve already seen and times that I feel were pivotal…

So, I’m just wondering…is this healthy? Too much of it surely can’t be good for oneself. I’ve got to see a doctor, or a shrink, or something, I’ll do whatever it takes to understand this feeling and what it means. Even the events that occurred tonight, they have this glossy sheen about them, like someone coated them in that vanilla syrup we put in our drinks at work. That’s it! it’s an ice cream dream…I’m just swimming in a large, old fashioned soda. The question is…do I drink it in? Or to I take it to the proverbial kitchen, call it an extra, a mess up? “Oh, whoops, they didn’t order whipped cream on this one…hide it before Tony comes in…” Whatever it is, it’s sweet…I think…

No, that can’t be right. I’d like to eat my brownie and have my hot fudge too, thank you very much.

I guess a big part of it is the fact that you never come in anymore, you used to sit at my end of the soda bar and always order the exact same thing. I was never sorry to make it, cuz I made it so well. You see it was my favorite, because it was your favorite. I would serve it up, watch your reaction, and smile. That was the best part, cuz I knew you were satisfied…and so was I, you didn’t even half to tip. That smile was enough. That was until I had to go to the basement...I had to fill the syrup bottles, it’s my job afterall. When I came back…you were gone…Man……now I really feel nostalgic…I’m gonna need to go on break sometime soon.

Ah, well… I guess I’m just oblivious…I’ll be in the back rolling silverware if you need me…

"I get so distracted by some people's reactions that I don't see my own faults for what they are. At times so self destructive, with no intent or motive, but behind this emotion, there lies a sensible heart..."