Sick Jack's got a hole in his head...

I envy that man, Oh yes…I do, I envy him for what he is. I envy him for what he is doing. I envy him for what he is going to become. With every fiber of my being I envy him. I envy him because of what he possesses. I envy him because of what he does not have. I envy him because of his ideological beauty. Every day that I walk past him, he is ever constant. He resides in the same place, occupied with the same objective that he has been occupied with since the day he was created. Every day that I walk past him, he is totally and utterly consumed with the one task for which he was created. What is this task you ask? Just that, the task of creation. The task of creating himself. By slow and steady work, he is shaping his own form, his own identity. It is for this that I envy that man. With every fiber of my being I envy him.

We are not so different, he and I. Both of us were created for a purpose, both of us are working feverishly in order to accomplish that purpose. We are both working toward the creation of ourselves. But, what I do have…I wish I could give to him, for then he might work in such a manner that is different. He works, everyday that I walk past him, in the same manner, never straying from his work, and never diverting from his purpose, because he lacks instinct, a killer instinct. This, a natural motivator, is given to all living creatures, even to the entirety of the human race, save, it seems, this man. A natural motivator which draws me away from my purpose. A natural motivator which diverts me from my work. A natural motivator which attempts to portray itself as superior to the truth. A companion which hurts and condemns. This quality is what I have, Instinct, a killer Instinct, for it is a murder. Oh how I wish I could give it to him! How I wish I could bestow upon him Instinct, a killer instinct, for then he would work differently. Then he would be exactly like me, and not ever so faithful in his work. He would stray just as I do, and he would become distracted just as I do. Perhaps then we would understand one another, comfort one another, become fast companions, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps. But this action is impossible, and so I continue to envy that man. Oh yes, I do…with every fiber of my being I envy him.

However, I know one thing that comforts me in this situation. I know that, he will never accomplish his purpose, despite his ever constant work. I on the other hand, shall one day finally finish my task. With a bit of help from my Father above…I shall complete my self-creation.




"I get so distracted by some people's reactions that I don't see my own faults for what they are
At times so self destructive,with no intent or motive.. but behind this emotion, there lies a sensible heart..."